Q. Ah. What role?
A. Ariel.
Q. I see. Now, can you describe how you met Mr. P.?
A. Well, I first saw him at a cast party. It was a few weeks after the show opened, and some of the bigger sponsors had gotten invitations to come and meet us.
Q. And he came?
A. Yes, he did...
Q. Did anything about him strike you as out of the ordinary?
A. He...really wasn't much to look at. Kind of old? Reminded me of my dad. Dad used to do Hamlet--he'd be one of those guys in the court scenes, sitting on the edge. There he'd be, no lines, looking kind of noble--not noble like Hamlet, but noble enough.
Q. And Mr. P. was like that?
A. Yes, he gave the same impression. I think he was wearing corduroys, rolled up at the bottom. And his hair was parted strangely.
Q. Strangely?
A. In the back...
Q. Did you speak to him?
A. We said hello. He told me he was interested in Renaissance artists. Kind of a weird thing to bring up.
Q. Had you been discussing art that night?
A. No. We were mostly talking about a new show one of my cast mates was doing. Townsend. He was starring in an off-Broadway Ninja Turtles revival.
Q. So, continuing your discussion with Mr. P., did he say anything else that night?
A. Oh, I can barely remember. He muttered a lot. Something about eating a peach?
Q. And when was the next time you saw Mr. P.?
A. That was...oh God...I can hardly...

[Testimony of Mr. P.]

Q. Mr. P., You met Ms. M. at a cast party, correct?
A. Knew her already. Knew them all.
Q. By "knew" you mean you saw her in "The Little Mermaid"?
A. Indeed.
Q. But you first spoke with her at a cast party.
A. How should I presume?
Q. But you did, Mr. P. You did presume, didn't you?
A. Shall I say, I have gone at dusk through narrow streets and watched the smoke that rises from the pipes of lonely men?
Q. I'm sure you've smoked plenty of men's pipes, Mr. P., but right now we're talking about your appetite for peaches. What did you say to Ms. M. when you met her?
A. How should I begin?
Q. At the beginning, Mr. P.
A. Do I dare to eat a peach?
Q. Just so, Mr. P. By that you meant to sexually proposition Ms. M., correct?
A. That is not what I meant at all!
Q. Then what did you mean, Mr. P.?
A. It's impossible to say!
Q. I see. We'll leave it at that. Now, isn't it true you followed Ms. M. home later that week?
A. An overwhelming question...
Q. Well?
A. I lingered upon the pools that stand in drains, let fall upon my back the soot that falls from chimneys--
Q. Outside Ms. M.'s flat?
A. --slipped by the terrace, made a sudden leap--
Q. Mr. P., why did you go to Ms. M.'s flat?
A. --and rubbed my muzzle on her window pane...
Q. Mr. P.! So you admit you were there. And she saw you, didn't she?
A. I was afraid!
Q. What did you say?
A. [bellowing] Let us go then, you and I, when the evening is spread out against the sky like a patient etherised upon a table!
Q. And you meant her to be the patient, right?
A. No!
Q. Then what did you mean?
A. Just some talk of you and me.
Q. Of course. Will you tell us why you went there, Mr. P.?
A. I...have heard the mermaids singing, each to each...
Q. And?
A. I did not think that they would sing for me.